The Silent Day
Today, November 19th, is International Men’s Day. If you didn’t know, you’re part of the 64% who remain unaware that this day even exists. While International Women’s Day on March 8th receives widespread recognition across South Africa, its counterpart passes almost unnoticed in Mzansi.
Our Brothers Are Dying
The statistics are devastating. In South Africa, approximately 79% of mental health-related deaths are men—that’s 10,861 out of 13,774 deaths reported. We rank as the country with the third-highest suicide rate in Africa at 23.5 per 100,000 people, translating to about 14,000 deaths annually. Men are four to five times more likely to die by suicide than women.
The South African Depression and Anxiety Group (SADAG) reports 23 suicides daily in our country, with 230 serious attempts. For young people aged 15-29, suicide is the second leading cause of death. These aren’t just numbers—they’re our fathers, brothers, sons, and friends.
Why Our Men Stay Silent
In our communities, the pressure of ubuntu often demands that men be strong, stoic providers. Cultural expectations of masculinity prevent men from showing vulnerability. As Pretoria psychologist Steve Langa notes, “Society has placed many stereotypes about how men must deal with their emotions. They are made to present themselves as confident and fearless.”
This forced patriarchy is killing our men. When financial difficulties strike, when relationships crumble, when mental illness surfaces—our brothers suffer in silence rather than appear weak. The South African Society of Psychiatrists confirms that stigma prevents men from seeking help at almost every turn.
The Economic Factor
In a country where unemployment, poverty, and inequality are rampant, financial stress is a common driver for suicide across all age groups. Discovery Life’s 2024 report shows suicide accounted for 35% of death claims due to unnatural causes—higher than motor vehicle accidents (23%) or crime (17%). When men cannot provide for their families, the shame becomes unbearable.
What International Men’s Day Should Address
The 2024 theme, “Positive Male Role Models,” emphasises creating safe spaces where men can discuss mental health openly without stigma. This day should celebrate our men while addressing:
- Mental health access in townships and rural areas
- Breaking toxic masculinity norms that harm men
- Supporting boys facing educational challenges
- Addressing male homelessness (87% globally)
- Promoting healthy expressions of manhood
Ubuntu Means Caring for All
Our African philosophy of ubuntu—”I am because we are”—extends to men’s wellbeing. Gender equality isn’t about choosing sides; it’s about ensuring all our people thrive. We cannot build strong communities while our brothers silently struggle.
Call to Action
Next November 19th, let’s make International Men’s Day visible in South Africa. Let’s talk about men’s mental health in our homes, workplaces, and communities. Let’s encourage our brothers to seek help without shame.
If you’re a man struggling, asking for help is a strength, not a weakness. Your life matters to your community.
Resources
- SADAG 24/7 Helpline: 0800 567 567 (Free, all 11 languages)
- SADAG SMS: 31393 (counsellor calls back)
- Lifeline: 0861 322 322
- Suicide Crisis Line: 0800 567 567
Let’s honour our men—not just today, but every day.
References
- South African Society of Psychiatrists (2024). “Suicide Among Men-Stigma Prevents Seeking Help”
- SA Federation for Mental Health (2024). “A Silent Pandemic – Men’s Mental Health”
- Council for Medical Schemes (2024). “CMScript 7 of 2024: Focus on Attempted Suicide”
- Discovery Life (2024). “Claims Experience Report”
- Mail & Guardian (2025). “More people dying by suicide in South Africa”
- Spotlight (2024). “SA has the third highest suicide rate in Africa”
- IOL Sunday Independent (2024). “South Africa men five times more likely to commit suicide”
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